There are things I don’t let myself sit with for too long. Not because I don’t know they’re there…but because I know what happens when I do.

Everything gets louder. The thoughts I usually push past. The moments I brushed off. The things that didn’t feel right at the time but were easier to ignore. They all come back. And it’s not in a clear way.

It’s layered. One thought leads to another. One feeling pulls something else up with it.

Until it’s not just one thing anymore… it’s everything I didn’t want to deal with all at once.

So I keep moving. Keep myself distracted. Keep things just busy enough that I don’t have to sit in it for too long. Because the moment I slow down… it’s there.

And I think part of me already knows what I’d find if I really let myself go there.

Not answers. Just honesty. The kind that’s harder to ignore once you see it clearly. So I don’t go too deep. Not all at once.

Just enough to notice it’s there… and then I pull back again. I don’t know if that’s avoidance or just not being ready yet.

But I’m starting to understand that pushing it away doesn’t make it disappear.

It just waits.